Facebook is apparently planning ANOTHER UPDATE (cuz you know, the last ones have been so well received, only pissing off about 90% of users). One of the most annoying new things is the suggestions it makes. In the old days it just used to be “hey, you may know this person” based on, sometimes absolutely nothing. Ok, occasionally you would have friends in common with them, but occasionally you just get “hey, you live in England, maybe you might know this person, they live in Zanzibar, a country which also has the letter A in it”. Also, it really wouldn’t get a hint “look, I’ve rejected this suggestion about 15 times THIS WEEK, what else do I have to do to get it through to you that I really do not wish to speak to this person, just because we have a few mutual friends doesn’t mean I don’t wish to slit this persons throat and fuck the gash in their neck” and then you feel ashamed for thinking of such violently sexual images. Well done Facebook; you made me feel like an arsehole, I hope you’re happy now.
Anyway, I kind of forget where I was going with this. Oh yeah, the suggestions. Now, the suggestions are just kind of retarded “hey, you never speak to this person on Facebook, do it”. No, I speak to this person almost every day at work, fuck off. Or “he only has x friends, help him” or in English “this person is a loner and/or non existent. Make their life better, because without Facebook, people are worthless”. Surely they realise that sometimes I don’t want to speak to somebody, I just can’t be bothered to go through the hassle of deleting them. Quite possibly the most annoying thing about Facebook is when you get in touch with someone you haven’t seen in years, you get all happy and look forward to talking to them again, and then you find out that they are now a racist wanker. That sucks. Especially since I don’t like deleting people, so now I facebook friends with douchebags.
If Facebook really wants to evolve and change, it just needs to do the following things;
- Allow us to appear offline and still see who is online. The only reason we would appear offline is because we wish to avoid speaking to people. This is usually for two reasons; 1) we are busy. 2) We are avoiding somebody. Now, if you’re doing the 2nd one, you have no way of telling when the person you’re avoiding has gone offline. Have to depend on dumb luck.
- Add a dislike button. Simple.
- Allow us a tiny bit of customisation. I’m not asking for it to be MySpace; which occasionally just looked like the internet vomiting up glow sticks.
- Sort out Facebook chat. That thing is very temperamental. It’s nearly impossible to hold a conversation on it, due to it cutting off users randomly.
- More tabs at the bottom.
- Let us know when people have deleted us. Otherwise it’s just guesswork as to which our friends actually hate us now.
All that’s certain is that if it doesn’t change something soon, facebook will end up as dead and desolate as bebo.
also; check out www.lamebook.com for more facebook silliness
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